title: Atlantis

author: lisa roquin

fandom: Harry Potter/Stargate Atlantis

disclaimer: all copyrighted characters and their "universes" belong to their respective authors, writers, creators, production companies, producers and long lists of people that are so very much not me. Quite simply, if you recognize it, it isn't mine. No profit made, no harm intended, just having fun.

summary: Who hired Neville?

Hermione flinched away from the penlight that seemed determined to blind her.

"Easy lass,"

"Where am I?"

"Atlantis,"

"WHAT?" Hermione sat up quickly and regretted it as the room wobbled. She clung to the side of the stretcher like cot for support. "Neville? What happened to Neville?"

"Is that the lad's name?"

Hermione glanced over to the other cot and gave a sigh of relief. She pulled her wand. "Envenerate,"

Neville jerked from the force of the spell. "Did it work?"

"Bloody HELL! Neville we're in Atlantis according to this man."

"That wasn't supposed to happen" Neville frowned.

"Really" Hermione said sarcastically.

"Well is the Atlantean Honeysuckle at least here"

Hermione made a wordless noise of frustration. "I need parchment and quill to start the Arithmancy calculations to get us home. You worry about the bloody plant seeds."

"Hermione,"

"I know. I know Neville. I'm sorry." Hermione shook her head.

"Uh, just hold your horses,"

Hermione looked at the dark haired man. He had an American accent. He and the one who was at least a medic, if not some sort of Doctor, were both wearing fairly normal looking Muggle-type clothes. Or at least some sort of uniform that definitely looked muggle. The medic/doctor/whatever he was had a Scottish accent.

"Where are you from?" Hermione had to know.

"America."

"Oh bloody hell. What year is it?"

"2005"

"NEVILLE! WE'RE IN ANOTHER GALAXY!"

"Huh?"

Hermione put her head in her hands and groaned. "London is light years away."

"Light years?" Neville frowned.

"LONDON?" the American yelped.

"Never mind Neville. Do you have any greenhouses still functioning in the city? If so let Neville go fix them up and get things growing. He's a genius with plants. It's anything else he's dangerous with."

"Hermione" Neville glared.

"Neville, we're not on earth, we're not anywhere near earth. We're on another planet."

"Oh is that all?"

"IS THAT ALL?"

"If they have a Ring we can get home."

"Ring?"

"Like a giant portkey, you step through one ring and come out on another ring on another planet."

Hermione blinked. Blinked again. "Neville those are only legends."

"According to what Bill was saying the American Muggle government has the ring that they found in Egypt. Goblins are still cranky about that."

"Goblins?" the Scot frowned.

"Muggles have..." Hermione sighed. "How on earth did they manage to make it work--"

"Isn't Eckletissty like lightning? It was supposed to take a Lightning Strike Spell to make it work."

"Electricity."

"Oh whatever." Neville said dismissively.

Hermione shook her head.

"You aren't from London." a third man said sharply.

"Yes I am. My parents are dentists and I work for the Department of Mysteries at the British Ministry of Magic. Neville has been working there temporarily we're trying to catalogue some artifacts that seem to be powered by organic means--potions made from Atlantean flora which no longer exist on earth. The translations and calculations...I don't understand what went wrong exactly. The spell should have brought the components we needed to us..."

"Unless the plants aren't capable of moving"

Hermione sighed. "I'll sort it out Neville."

"Did I mess this up?"

"No it wasn't you Neville, something was missing. It wouldn't surprise me if we weren't allowed to see everything or if the idiots at the ministry couldn't find something."

"True"

"There's no such thing as magic, let alone a ministry of magic"

"Oh boy, he's a Muggle isn't he?"

"Yes, Neville, I'd expect most of them here are Muggles."

"What are your names?" the Scott wanted to know.

"Hermione Granger."

"Neville Longbottom"

"Where did you go to schol?"

"Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry"

"What house? And who was your head of house--and Transfiguration teacher?"

"Neville and I were both in Gryffindor. Professor Minerva McGonagall was our head of house, and the Transfiguration teacher at Hogwarts when we were there. She still is."

"My grandmother was Melepone McGonagall. She was a Squib. My grandfather was a Muggle. None of my family's ever gone to Hogwarts since. But I know of it."

"Carson?" the American asked skeptically.

"I believe them. And I wonder if they don't have the ATA gene as well"

"Hermione? Is he talking about trousers?"

"No Neville, genetics."

"What?"

"Base particles?" Hermione offered. Neville could magically splice and manipulate plant genomes but they weren't called genomes by the Wizarding World. Honestly, she felt like a walking translation dictionary some days.

"Why didn't he say so"

"He did Neville, Muggles call base particles genes."

"I thought jeans were denim trousers."

"Neville's a pureblood." Hermione told Professor McGonagall's nephew. "I'm a muggleborn."

"Aye, that makes sense then."

"It does?" the American frowned.

"Wizards do everything with magic, I know that much. Exactly what or how I canna say, but I do know they use magic for everything." Carson nodded.

"There's no such thing as magic."

"Hermione, think the have a caputter to do your Arithmancy on?"

"Computer, Neville, and it would probably require a complete program written."

~*~*~

"Can I turn him into a toad? It wouldn't hurt him. I was quite good at Transfiguration. Took top marks on my NEWTs" Hermione asked Major Sheppard. She and Neville had been at Atlantis for four weeks now. The hydroponic gardens had been replenished and were flourishing with magical aid. Neville had seeds and cuttings ready to take back with them. She had the location of the Ring on earth, Colorado. A portkey was ready to take them from Colorado to Hogsmeade. Illegal international Portkey but it couldn't be helped.

Carson Beckett had determined they did indeed have the ATA gene--from both their parents, where those on Atlantis who could make Atlantean tch work had the Ancient's gene from one parent. Neville had not two but seven strains of the Ancient's gene. Another time Hermione would have been fascinated by that, and wanting to learn exactly how Carson had determined that.

Just now, all she wanted to do was to go home.

"Can you turn him back?" Sheppard wanted to know.

"YOU ARE NOT GOING TO TURN ME INTO A TOAD!" Rodney McKay shouted.

"I will if you keep annoying me." Hermione muttered.

"This is insane. There is no such thing as magic."

"And what do you call everything Neville has done in the Hydroponics rooms."

"I don't know. Ancient's technology. Not magic. There's no such thing as magic."

Hermione rolled her eyes and pointed her wand.

"RIBBIT!"

Sheppard gaped then snickered. "Green's not a bad look for you, Rodney."

"Finite Incantatem" Hermione smirked. "Give me a logical reason for that one."

Rodney glared. "That's wrong"

"What's wrong?"

"Your formula. It's wrong"

"It's adjusted for magical variances."

"It is still wrong"

"Where?" Hermione glared.

"There"

John Sheppard settled back in his chair and watched the two of them argue over squiggles and symbols. Magical physics. Unbelievable. Even the hocus pocus folks had their science geeks.

~*~*~

Elizabeth Weir stepped through the Stargate first. Between Rodney and Hermione they'd managed to charge up the ZPMs on Atlantis, and if the SGC had a charged ZPM then that could mean a regular stream of supplies for the outpost.

"Thanks for your hospitality." Hermione smiled then made sure the backpack filled with magically shrunken seeds and cuttings was securely on her back. She grabbed Neville by the arm and took the portkey from her pocket.

"Hope to have you back soon." Elizabeth smiled. "Rodney and Radek will miss your discussions."

"We'll see." Hermione smiled and activated the Portkey.

"Can you explain that?" General O'Neill asked.

"It's a long story. Short version is that they are part of a small community of Ancients descendants still on earth that live apart from the rest of the world."

"Huh" O'Neill said. "Yeah, that's gotta be a long story. Sgt. Make sure we have a lot of coffee for this."